The Good Bargain
Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm
A peasant had driven his cow to the fair and sold her for seven talers. On the way home he had to walk past a pond, and already from afar he heard the frogs crying, "ak, ak, ak, ak" [which in his language sounded like, "eight, eight, eight, eight"].
"Well," he said he to himself, "they are talking nonsense. It is seven that I was paid, not eight."
When he reached the water, he shouted to them, "You are stupid creatures. Don't you know any better than that? It is seven talers, not eight."
The frogs, however, kept up with their "ak, ak, ak, ak."
"Now then, if you won't believe it, I can count it out for you." Then taking his money out of his pocket, he counted out the seven talers, twenty-four groschens in each one.
However, the frogs paid no attention to his counting, and again cried out, "ak, ak, ak, ak."
"Aha!" shouted the peasant, quite angry. "If you think that you know better than I do, then count it yourselves," and he threw all the money at them into the water. He stood still, wanting to stay there until they were finished and had returned his money to him, but the frogs did not budge from their opinion, and continued to cry out, "ak, ak, ak, ak." And furthermore, they did not throw the money back to him.
He waited a long time, until evening finally came, and he had to go home. Then he cursed the frogs, shouting at them, "You water-splashers, you thick-heads, you goggle-eyes, you have big mouths and can shout until a person's ears hurt, but you cannot count seven talers. Do you think that I want to stand here until you are finished?"
Then he walked away, with the frogs still crying out after him, "ak, ak, ak, ak." He arrived at home in a sour mood.
Some time later he bought himself another cow, which he slaughtered. He calculated that if he sold the meat for a good price, he could earn as much as the two cows had been worth together, and have the hide as well.
He went to town with the meat. An entire pack of dogs had gathered together just outside the town gate, with a large GREyhound at the head of the pack. The greyhound jumped at the meat, sniffing and barking, "bow, wow, bow, wow."
When the dog would not stop, the peasant said to him, "Yes, I understand that you are saying, "bow, wow," because you want some of the meat, but I would be in a fine state if I gave it to you."
The dog's only answer was, "bow, wow."
"Will you not eat it all up, and will you be responsible for your companions?"
"Bow, wow, " said the dog.
"Well, if you insist on it, I will leave it with you. I know you well, and I know who your master is. But I am telling you, I must have my money in three days, or you will be sorry. You can just bring it out to me."
With this he unloaded the meat and turned back toward home. The dogs jumped on the meat, barking loudly, "bow, wow."
The peasant heard them from afar and said to himself, "Listen, they all want some, but the big dog will be responsible for it."
When three days had passed, the peasant thought, "Tonight you'll have the money in your pocket," and was quite satisfied. But no one came to pay him.
"No one is to be trusted nowadays," he said.
Finally he lost his patience and went to town and to the butcher, from whom he demanded his money. The butcher thought it was a joke, but the peasant said, "All joking aside, I want my money. Did not the big dog bring home to you an entire slaughtered cow three days ago?"
Then the butcher GREw angry, picked up a broomstick and chased him out.
"Wait," said the peasant. "There is still some justice in the world," and he went to the royal palace and asked for a hearing. He was led before the king, who was sitting there with his daughter. The king asked him what injury he had suffered.
"Alas," he said, "the frogs and the dogs stole my belongings from me, and the butcher paid me for my losses with a stick." Then he told them everything that had happened.
At this the king's daughter began to laugh out loud, and the king said to him, "I cannot make that right for you, but instead you shall have my daughter for your wife. She had never laughed before in her whole life, until just now at you, and I have promised her to the man who could make her laugh. You can thank God for your good fortune."
"Oh," answered the peasant, "I do not want her. I have one wife at home already, and she is too much for me. Whenever I go home, it is just as if I had a wife standing in every corner."
Then the king GREw angry, and said, "You are a lout."
"Alas, your majesty," answered the peasant, "what can you expect from an ox, but beef?"
"Wait," replied the king. "You shall have another reward. Get out of here for now, but come back in three days, and then five hundred shall be counted out for you in full."
When the peasant passed through the gate, the sentry said, "You made the king's daughter laugh, so you must have received something very good."
"Yes, that is right," answered the peasant. "Five hundred are to be counted out to me."
"Listen," said the soldier. "Give me some of it. How can you spend all that money?"
"Because it is you," said the peasant, "you shall have two hundred. In three days report to the king, and have it counted out for you."
A Jew, who had been standing nearby and had overheard the conversation, ran after the peasant, took hold of his coat, and said, "Miracle of God, what a child of fortune you are! I will change it for you. I will change it for you into smaller coins. What do you want with hard talers?"
"Jew," said the peasant, "You can have three hundred. Give it to me right now in coins. Three days from now you will be paid for it by the king."
The Jew was delighted with his small profit, and brought the sum in bad groschens, three of which were worth two good ones. After three days had passed, in keeping with the king's order, the peasant went before the king.
"Pull off his coat," said the king "He shall have his five hundred."
"Alas," said the peasant, "they no longer belong to me. I gave two hundred of them to the sentry, and the Jew has changed three hundred for me, so rightfully nothing more belongs to me."
In the meantime the soldier and the Jew entered and demanded what they had received from the peasant, and they received the blows carefully counted out.
The soldier bore it patiently, for he already knew how it tasted, but the Jew cried out pitifully, "Oh my, oh my, are these the hard talers?"
The king had to laugh at the peasant, and when his anger had subsided, he said, "Because you lost your reward even before you received it, I will replace it for you. Go into my treasure chamber and take as much money for yourself as you want."
The peasant did not need to be told twice, and he stuffed as much as would fit into his big pockets. After that he went to an inn and counted out his money.
The Jew had crept after him and heard him muttering to himself, "That rascal of a king has cheated me after all. If he himself had given me the money, then I would know how much I have. Now how can I know if what I had the luck to put into my pockets is right?"
"God forbid," said the Jew to himself, "he is speaking disrespectfully of his majesty. I will run and report him, and then I shall get a reward, and furthermore he will be punished."
When the king heard what the peasant had said he fell into a rage, and ordered the Jew to go and bring the offender to him.
The Jew ran to the peasant and said, "You are to go to his majesty the king at once, and just as you are."
"I know better than that what is right," answered the peasant. "First let me have a new coat made for myself. Do you think that a man with so much money in his pockets should go before the king in this tattered old coat?"
The Jew, seeing that the peasant could not be moved without another coat, and fearing that if the king's anger cooled, he himself would lose his reward, and the peasant his punishment, said, "Out of pure friendship I will lend you a handsome coat for a little while. What people will not do for love!"
The peasant was satisfied with this, put on the Jew's coat, and went off with him.
The king confronted the peasant with the evil things the Jew had accused him of saying.
"Oh," said the peasant, "what a Jew says is always a lie. No true word ever comes out of his mouth. That rascal there is even capable of claiming that I have his coat on."
"What are you saying?" shouted the Jew. "Is that coat not mine? Did I not lend it to you out of pure friendship, so that you could appear before his majesty the king?"
When the king heard this, he said, "For sure the Jew has deceived one of us, either myself or the peasant." And once again he had the Jew paid out in hard talers.
The peasant, however, went home wearing the good coat and with the good money in his pockets, saying to himself, "This time I made it."
从前有个农夫，赶着一头母牛去集市出售，结果卖了七个银币。在回家的路上，他经过一个池塘，远远地就听到青蛙们在叫：「呱——呱——呱——呱——。」「嘿，」农夫自言自语地说，「你们真是在胡说八道。我只卖了七个银币，不是八个。」他走到池塘边，冲着青蛙喊道：「你们这些愚蠢的东西！难道你们还没有搞清楚吗？是七个银币，不是八个！」可是青蛙还在那里叫着：「呱，呱，呱，呱。」「我说，要是你们真的不相信，我可以数给你们看。」农夫说着便从口袋里掏出钱来数，并把二十个小钱算成一个银币，结果数来数去还是七个银币，然而青蛙们根本不管他数出来的钱是多少，只管一个劲地叫着：「呱，呱，呱，呱。」「甚么？」农夫生气地喊道，「要是你们自以为懂得比我还多，那你们就自己去数吧。」他说着把钱全部扔进了水里。他站在池塘边，等待着青蛙们把钱数完后还给他，可是青蛙们却固执己见，仍然叫着：「呱，呱，呱，呱。」牠们再也没有把钱还回来。农夫在那里等了很久，一直等到天黑，才不得不回家。临走的时候，他大声骂青蛙：「你们这些水鬼，你们这些蠢货，你们这些阔嘴巴、鼓眼睛的傢伙！你们整天吵得别人耳朵根不得清静，而你们居然连七个银币都数不清！你们以为我会一直呆在这里等着你们把钱数清吗？」他说完这番话就走了，而青蛙们还在喊着：
「呱，呱，呱，呱」，气得他到家时仍然憋着一肚子气。
过了一阵子，农夫又买了一头牛，把牠宰了。他一算计，发现自己不仅可以挣回两头牛的钱，而且还白得一张牛皮。於是，他把肉运到了城里；可是城门口有一大群狗，领头的是一只大狼犬。大狼犬围着牛肉跳来跳去，一面闻一面「汪，汪，汪」地叫着。农夫看到自己怎么也制止不了牠，便对牠说：「是的，是的，我知道你那 '汪，汪，汪'的意思。你是想吃点肉，可要是我们肉给了你，我自己就倒霉了！」但是狼犬只是回答「汪，汪，汪」。「那么你愿不愿意答应不把肉全吃完，并且愿意为其他狗作担保呢？」「汪，汪，汪，」狼犬叫着。「好吧，要是你硬要这么做，我就把肉都留在这里。我认识你，也知道你在谁家当差。我把话说在头里，你必须在三天内把钱还给我，不然我叫你好看！你可以把钱送到我家去。」说着，农夫就把肉卸在地上，转身回家去了。那群狗一下子扑到牛肉上，大声叫着：「汪，汪，汪！」
农夫在远处听到牠们的叫声，自言自语地说：「听啊，牠们现在都想吃一点，但账得由那头大狼犬付。」
三天过去了，农夫想：「今晚我的钱就可以装在我的口袋里了。」想到这里，他非常高兴。然而谁也没有来给他还钱。「这年月谁也不能相信！」他说。到最后他终於不耐烦了，只好进城找屠夫要钱。屠夫以为他是在开玩笑，可是农夫说：「谁和你开玩笑？我要我的钱！难道你的那条大狼犬三天前没有把一整头牛的肉给你送来吗？」屠夫这次真的发火了，一把抓起扫帚把农夫赶了出去。「你等着，」农夫说，「这世界上还有公道呢！」他说着就跑到王宫去喊冤，结果被带去见国王。国王正和公主坐在一起，他问农夫有甚么冤屈。「天哪！」他说，「青蛙和狗把我的钱拿走了，屠夫不但不认账，还用扫帚打我。」接着，他把事情从头至尾讲了一遍，逗得公主开心地哈哈大笑。国王对他说：「这件事情我无法为你主持公道，不过我可以把我女儿嫁给你。她一辈子还从来没有像笑你那样大笑过；我许过愿，要把她嫁给能使她发笑的人。你能交上这样的好运，真得感谢上帝！」
「哦，」农夫回答，「我才不想娶你女儿呢。我已经有了一个老婆，而这个老婆我都嫌多。每次我回到家里，总觉得到处都有她似的。」国王一听就生了气，说：「你真是个蠢货！」「嗨，国王老爷，」农夫说，「除了牛肉，你还能指望从牛身上得到甚么呢？」「等等，」国王说，「我另外给你一样奖赏吧。你现在去吧，过三天再回来。我要给你整整五百块银元。」
农夫从宫门出来时，卫兵问他：「你把公主逗笑了，肯定得到甚么奖赏了吧？」「我想是吧，」农夫说，「国王要给我整整五百块银元呢。」「你听我说，」卫兵说，「你要那么多钱干甚么？分一点给我吧！」「既然是你嘛，」农夫说，「我就给你两百块吧。你三天后去见国王，让他把钱付给你好了。」站在旁边的一位犹太人听到了他们的谈话，赶紧追上农夫，拽着他的外衣说：「我的天哪，你的运气真好啊！你要那些大银元做甚么？把它们换给我吧，我给你换成小钱。」「犹太人，」农夫说，「你还有三百块银元好拿，赶紧把小钱给我吧。三天后让国王把钱给你好了。」犹太人很高兴自己佔到了便宜，给农夫拿来了一些坏铜钱。这种坏铜钱三枚只能值两枚。三天过去了，农夫按国王的吩咐，来到了国王的面前。国王突然说道：「脱掉他的外衣，给他五百板子。」「嗨，」农夫说道，「这五百已经不属於我了。我把其中的两百送给了卫兵，把另外的三百换给了犹太人，所以它们根本不属於我。」就在这时，卫兵和犹太人进来向国王要钱，结果分别如数挨了板子。卫兵因为尝过板子的滋味，所以挺了过来；犹太人却伤心地说：「天哪，天哪，这就是那些沉重的银元吗？」国王忍不住对农夫笑了，怒气也消失了。他说：「既然你在得到给你的奖赏之前就已经失去了，我愿意给你一些补偿。你到我的宝库去取一些钱吧！愿意拿多少就拿多少。」这句话农夫一听就懂，把他的大口袋装得满满的，然后他走进一家酒店，数着他的钱。犹太人悄悄跟在他的后面，听见他在低声嘀咕：「那个混蛋国王到底还是把我给骗了！他干吗不自己把钱给我呢？这样我就能知道他究竟给了我多少。他现在让我自己把钱装进口袋，我怎么知道有多少钱呢？」「我的天哪，」犹太人心中想道，「这个傢伙居然在说国王大人的坏话。我要跑去告诉国王，这样我就能得到奖赏，而这傢伙就会受到惩罚。」
国王听了农夫说过的话大发雷霆，命令犹太人去把农夫抓来。犹太人跑到农夫那里，对他说：「国王让你赶紧去见他。」「我知道怎么去更好，」农夫回答，「我要先请裁缝给我做件新外套。你认为口袋里装着这么多钱的人能穿着这身旧衣服去见国王吗？」犹太人看到农夫怎么也不愿意穿着旧衣服去见国王，怕时间一长国王的怒火平息了，自己会得不到奖赏，农夫也会免遭惩罚，便对他说：「纯粹是出於友谊，我暂时把我的外套借给你。为了友爱，人可是甚么事情都肯做的呀！」农夫对这种安排很满意，便穿上犹太人的外套，和他一起去见国王。
国王责问农夫为甚么要说犹太人所告发的那些坏话。
「啊，」农夫说，「犹太人甚么时候说过真话呢？狗嘴里吐不出象牙来！这混蛋大概还要说我身上的外套是他的呢。」
「你说甚么？」犹太人嚷道，「难道那外套不是我的吗？难道我没有出於友谊把它借给你，好让你来见国王吗？」国王听到这里便说：「这个犹太人肯定骗了人，不是骗了我就是骗了农夫，」然后又命令人再赏给他一些硬板子。农夫穿着漂亮的外套，口袋里装着鼓鼓的钱，边往家走边想：「这次的交易做成功了！」
