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Theater Manager: Madam, you may not take dog into the theater. I'm sorry it is not permitted. Woman: That's ridiculous! What harm could the movies do to a little dog like this? 有害的电影 剧院经理:夫人,您不能把狗带进剧院。很抱歉这是不允许的。 (02/18/2009 20:58:46) [查看全文]
Teacher: We all know that heat causes an object to expand and cold causes it to contract. Now, can anyone give me a good example? John: Well, in the summer the days are long, and in the winter the days are short. 一个好例子 (02/18/2009 20:58:46) [查看全文]
Mum: Why are you crying? Tommy: I cleaned the bird cage and the canary disappeared. Mum: How did you clean it? Tommy: With a vacuum cleaner, Mum. 他为什么哭? 妈妈:你为什么哭啊? 汤米:我刚才打扫鸟笼来着,金丝雀不见了。 妈妈:你怎么打扫的鸟笼? (02/18/2009 20:58:45) [查看全文]
After the barber had cut, nicked and gashed him, the customer asked for a glass of water. The barber said, " What's the matter---do you feel faint?" "No, "said the customer, " I just want to see if my mouth still holds water." (02/18/2009 20:58:44) [查看全文]
In a cinema, a lady turned round and said to the giggling schoolgirls behind her: "Do you mind, I'm trying to watch the film." "In that case," said one of them, "you're facing the wrong way." 你看错方向了 剧院里,一位女士回头对后面正在说笑的一群女 (02/18/2009 20:58:42) [查看全文]
Doctor: How many ears and eyes does a cat have? Patient: Two of each. Doctor: And how many legs does it have? Patient: Say, Doctor, haven't you ever seen a cat? 医生和病人 医生:一只猫有几个耳朵和眼睛? 病人:都是两个。 医生:那么它有几条腿呢? (02/18/2009 20:58:42) [查看全文]
Teacher: What great event happened in 1809? Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born. Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812? Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday. 重大事件 老师:1809年发生 (02/18/2009 20:58:42) [查看全文]
New Husband: Did you sew the button on my shirt, darling? New Wife: No, dear. I couldn't find the button, so I just sewed up the buttonhole. 只缝上了扣眼儿 新婚丈夫:你给我把扣子缝好了吗,亲爱的? 新婚妻子:没有,亲爱的。我找不到扣子,所以我只把扣眼儿给缝上了。 (02/18/2009 20:58:40) [查看全文]
A father said to his sons: "Tomorrow your mother is going to bake a pie. Who is going to eat it?" The oldest son replied: "Father, I'll eat it all!" The father then said: "Tomorrow I'm going to butcher a pig. Who is going to eat it?" The sa (02/18/2009 20:58:39) [查看全文] Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee. Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain. The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, " Go home and get the umbrella." The little turtle replied, "I will, if you don't drink my offee." "W (02/18/2009 20:58:39) [查看全文]
Dentist: I'm sorry, madam, but I'll have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your son's tooth. Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction. Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so l (02/18/2009 20:58:37) [查看全文] Mr. Brown arrived for work an hour late. His clothes were torn and tattered. He was banged and bruised, and he had one arm in a sling. His boss was purple with rage. "It's ten o'clock," screamed the boss, "you were supposed to be here at nine. What happened?" (02/18/2009 20:58:35) [查看全文]
Whose 50 Cents Jacky: I found 50 cents on the sidewalk in front of school. Tommy: I think it's mine. I dropped 50 cents there today and couldn't find it. Jacky: But what I found was two quarters. Tommy: Then I'm sure it's min (02/18/2009 20:58:34) [查看全文]
A Strange Telephone Call A Chicago family was having dinner when the phone rung. The maid answered and said, "It sure is!" and hung up. The same thing happened five minutes later. " What's going on?" asked the father. "Some crackpot, (02/18/2009 20:58:34) [查看全文]
Apples and Oranges Big brother: All right, I'll help you with your homework. Now, if you had five apples and I took one away, how many would you have? Little sister: I don't know. In my class we do arithmetic with oranges. (02/18/2009 20:58:32) [查看全文] |
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