The smell is terrible
A man came to the police station and complained, " I have three
brothers----We all lived in one room. One of my brothers has six cats;
another has five dogs, and the other has four goats. The smell is terrible.

I wish he were
A big crowd were gathered outside a hotel where a famous
　 millionaire died of a car accident. Among the crowd a young man
　 apparently looked very sad. An old man who felt sympathy and
　 said to the young man, " I unders

Still Too Dear
An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything
　 　too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:" How much
　 　this stuff?"
　　　　 "Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap." The lady said,
　 　"It is too much,

How fast were you going when you reached shore?"
A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his

The Lucky Cat
"Father," said Jimmy, running into the drawing-room," there's a bigblack cat in the dining-room."
"Never mind, Jimmy," said his father drowsily, "black cats are lucky.""This one is; he's just had your dinner!"
 

St Peter's question
Three men, a doctor, an accountant and a lawyer are dead and they appear in front of St Peter. St Peter tells them that they have to answer one question in order to get to Heaven. He looks at the doctor and asks, "There was a

Talking clock
                              会说话的钟
While proudly showing off his new a

What Does Mr. Johnson Want to Borrow?
Mr. Johnson: Are you using you mower this afternoon?
Mr.Smith: Yes.
Mr.Johnson: Fine. Then can I borrow your tennis racket, since
you won't be needing it?
他到底想借什么？
约翰逊先生：

I Had to Change It Twice
Judge: I don't understand why you broke into the same store
three nights in a row.
Prisoner: Well, Your Honor, I picked out a dress for my wife,
and I had to change it twice because she didn't like the style.

Big Surprise
Visitor: Is this a healthy place to live in?
Local yokel:Yes, sir. When I arrived here, I couldn't walk or
eat solid food.
Visitor: What was the matter with you?
Local yokel:Nothing---I was born here.

Grandson
　　A well dressed young man demanded as soon as he entered the restaurant:
　　"Serve me, quick! Give me your best. I don't care the price."
　　Not like the way he talked, the waiter said to him: "Hey Buddy, it doesn't matter you have a lot of money. You are still son of somebody, and grandson o

wake up
A couple stopped talking to each other after a quarrel. However, the husband was worried about to catch up a meeting early next morning, so he wrote his wife a note:"Please wake me up at 7:00am." The next morning, he was upset to wake up at 8:00. Then he saw a note at his bedside:"Wake up you stupid! It

Who do you think you are? (你以为你是谁？)
The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn’t let him aboard.
　　“It is too crowded, “they shouted.” who do you think you are?”
　　“I am the driver.” he said.

  Not to Be Taken Out
Mark Twain once went to borrow a certain book from a neighbour in Tarry town.
"May I borrow a book from you?" he asked politely.
"Yes,you're more than welcome to it," the neighbour told him.
"Bu

lecture
On a snowstorm day, a college professor drove 75 kilos to teach only to find one audience in the classroom. Then, when he finished lecturing and was ready to leave, the person that has been sitting in the audience seat stopped him:"Don't go! I'm the next lecturer scheduled for this room."